Ndabyibuka nkiri agakobwa gato mu myaka irenga 10 ishize, nigeze gutaha ubukwe bw’umuvandimwe wanjye, mbona uburyo imiryango yateranye, inshuti ze n’abana tungana batashye ikirori, ntibagiwe amamodoka yatatswe mu buryo butangaje, nange ndavuga ngo inzozi zange ni ukuzakora ibyo birori by’akataraboneka.
Nakuranye iyo ntego, gusa ibyo maze iminsi mbona mu ngo z’iyi minsi, bituma ‘amabere yikora ntonsa’ nkagirira ubwoba urushaho rwa none.
Hafi aha, ubwo nasomaga raporo y’urwego rw’ubucamanza y’umwaka wa 2024/2025, nabonye uburyo hari ubwiyongere bukabije bw’ingo zisenyuka zitamaze kabiri , bituma nibaza zimwe mu mpamvu nyinshi zitera iyi miryango guhitamo gufata iki cyemezo kigoye.
Iyi raporo yagaragazaga ko mu mwaka wa 2024/2025 haburanishijwe imanza 2.674 z’abari barashakanye basaba gatanya, zivuye ku manza 2.833 mu mwaka wari wabanje.
Muri raporo zitandukanye bigaragazwa ko umubare w’abasaba kongera kwisubirira mu kirambi ( gatanya) , warazamutse vuba.
Nko mu 2016, uyu mubare wari hasi kuko muri uwo mwaka hakiriwe ibirego 21, mu 2017 biba 69 naho mu 2018 biba 1311.
Mu 2019, imiryango 8941 yemerewe n’inkiko gutandukana nk’uko byatangajwe muri raporo y’Ikigo cy’Igihugu gishinzwe Ibarurishamibare (NISR) mu gihe mu 2020 inkiko zakiriye ibirego 3213.
Hakorwe iki ngo ingo zirambe ?
Ndahimana ( Izina ryahimbwe) ni umugabo umaze imyaka itatu yubatse urugo.
Uyu mugabo yabwiye Umunota ko urugo rwubakwa n’ibintu bitatu by’ingenzi ari byo ubushake no gufatanya kubaka urugo, kwizera no guharanira intego imwe .
Yongeraho ko iyo ibyo bintu bibuze, hadukamo umwuka mubi hagati y’abashakanye bishobora kugera kuri gatanya.
Avuga ko kubaka urugo atari ibintu byo kugerageza cyangwa kurebera ku bandi kuko iyo bibaye habaho gusenyuka.
Ati ” kubaka urugo ni ntego iba yagizwe n’abagiye kurwubaka ntabwo urugo ari ikintu mugiye gukorera igerageza ngo hanyuma ni byanga mubivemo wenda kuko yabonye kanaka abivamo akumva nawe nuko byagenda”.
Akomeza agira ati “Ni byo koko urugo rukwiye kurangwamo umunezero, haba mu buryo bw’ ubushobozi, mu gikorwa cy’abashakanye, n’imyizerere. “
Kimwe muri ibi uko ari bitatu iyo gipfuye n’ibindi byose birapfa. Igihari , urugo si urwumwe ni urw’abantu babibiri bagomba gufatanya ntihagire utererana undi .”
Gucana inyuma mu bitiza umurindi gatanya
Gucana inyuma ku bashakanye na byo bikomeje kugaragara muri iki gihe haba ku bagore n’abagabo bubatse ingo.
Ejo bundi nibwo nagiye ku mbuga nkoranyambaga,’Youtube’ mpasanga inkuru y’umugabo wabwiraga umunyamakuru uburyo umugore we w’ikizungeri, amuca inyuma kandi atabuze amafaranga cyangwa ubushobozi.
Icyakora, hari abavuga ko nko ku bagabo bikunze kubaho akenshi byatewe n’uko umugore atahaye ibyishimo by’abashakanye umugabo we nubwo ntahamya ko ariyo ntandaro y’uwo mugore guca inyuma umugore we.
Abagore nabo bashinja abagabo kutubahiriza inshingano zaba iz’abashakanye bityo umugore agahitamo kujya kubishakira ahandi.
Inzobere mu muryango n’ubuzima bw’imyororokere zibivugaho iki ?
Umunyamakuru akaba n’inzobere mu buzima bw’imyororokere n’umuryango, Akarikumutima Regina , avuga ko gucana inyuma ahanini biterwa naho isi iri kwerekeza aho bamwe mu bagore batagiha icyubahiro gikwiye umugabo ufatwa nk’umutware w’urugo bityo nawe agashaka aho bamwubaha.
Ati “Iki gihe bitewe nuko isi irigutera imbere byihuse ,urugo rugenda ruhindura mu buryo bw’imyitwarire itandukanye na mbere.
Mbere niba umugore yaragumaga mu rugo, akita kubana no ku mugabo ,ubu siko bikimeze, ubu umugore ajya mu kazi n’umugabo akagenda.
Iyo bageze mu rugo kubera iryo terambere bashakisha nta wongera guca bugufi kubera ubuzima buba bwaba karanze, baba bameze nk’aho bose bayoboye urugo.
Ibyo bigatuma umugabo muri cya cyubahiro agombwa ,kwa kwiyumvamwo ubutware atabibona, agatangira kubona ko umugore we amurenze, amusuzugura, ugasanga bwa busabane bagakwiye kugirana bucikamwo kabiri.
Ibi bikazarangira umugabo atangiye kujya ku ruhande, ashaka abamucira bugufi kuko ari byo yari yaramenyereye. Ikiriho, abagabo byarabananiye kwiyakira, no guhuza iterambere, no kubaka urugo bikabananira. Ugasanga baratannye.
Akarikumutima avuga kandi ko kenshi usanga abashakanye bakorera kure y’urugo bityo bakisanga bagiye mu busambanyi,baciye inyuma y’abo bashakanye.
Ati ” Gukorera kure y’urugo bitera ubusambanyi. ibi bibatera kugira ubushacye bwo gutera akabariro kandi atari kumwe n’uwo bashakanye, bigatuma ashaka uwamufasha kandi n’uwasigaye mu rugo ugasanga niko bimeze. kandi mu by’ukuri hari uburyo wagakwiye kwitwara mu gihe bimeze uko ari ko abantu ntibabyumva.”
Yongeraho ko kandi ukutubahiriza inshingano z’abashakanye k’umugabo bishobora gutuma bamuca inyuma.
Ati “Indi mpamvu itera ubusambanyi ni ukudakora inshingano zo mu buriri neza, ugasanga umugabo apfubije umugore we cyangwa abikoze atabishaka, ananiwe, cyangwa umugore ugasanga nabwo abishaka kandi mu by’ukuri iyo umugabo amuha umwanya ,akamutegura byari bugende neza .”
Yakomeje ati ” Abagabo b’Abanyarwanda baracyafite imyumvire ya cyera ko ibyiyumviro by’umugore bidafite agaciro kandi mu byukuri umugore yambaye umubiri igihe cyose .”
Umubiri ugusaba gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina kandi umugabo ntashake kuyimukorera neza, yanayimukorera akayikora yikiza. Ibyo bituma umugore aha umwanya b’abandi bamutereta kuko barahari nubwo yabahakaniraga azagera igihe acike intenge aguce inyuma.”
Uyu yongeraho ko usibye ibyo, gucunga umutungo nabi, no kudahuza, bishora kongera gatanya mu ngo z’abashakanye.
Asanga hakwiye kujyaho amashuri yigisha kubaka urugo.
Ati ” Muri macye icyatuma gatanya igabanyuka cyangwa ubusambanyi, harimo gushyiraho amashuri yigisha kubaka urugo kuko hari abubaka batarigeze babasobanurira iby’urugo.
Kuko kubaka urugo bigizwe no kwiyemeza, kubaka urugo birenze urukundo, birenze ibintu bifatika. Ahubwo ni ukwiyemeza iyo wiyemeje urazinukwa.
Rero muri iryo shuri batozwa uruhare rw’umugore, umugabo mu kubaka urugo, bagatonzwa uko bashobora guhuza iterambere no kubaka.
Nubwo abantu badahuza igikomeje kuzamura umubare w’ugutandukana kw’abashakanye, hari abavuga ko hari nubwo gukurikira imitungo n’iraha na byo bigira uruhare muri iki kibazo cyamaze kuba imungu mu muryango nyarwanda.
Amategeko abivugaho iki?
Itegeko rivuga ko guca inyuma uwo mwashyingiranywe mu buryo bwemewe n’amategeko ,ugakorana imibonano mpuzabitsina n’undi muntu mutashyingiranywe aba ukoze icyaha cy’ubusambanyi.
Uwahamijwe icyaha cy’ubusambanyi ahanishwa igifungo cy’amezi atandatu (6) kugeza ku mwaka umwe (1). Iki gihano kinahanisha uwo basambanye, na we aramutse abihamijwe.
Usibye ibihano by’inshinjabyaha, gucana inyuma ni imwe mu mpamvu zikomeye zashingirwaho umuntu asaba ubutane (divorce) mu mategeko mbonezamubano agenga abantu n’umuryango mu Rwanda.
Ibi bituma uretse kuba ari icyaha gihanwa na Leta, kiba n’ikibazo cy’umuryango kigira ingaruka zikomeye ku bashakanye no ku mutungo wabo.
